How I saw my brain working
Posted on February 5th, 2017
I just want to describe an experience I had once after smoking weed a few years ago. I do not smoke it regularily and that was one of very few times I did it. I was in a very relaxed and happy state back then, also just last days of a long spiritual trip, and in an introvertic mood, so probably that facilitated my experience.
I observed how my brain constantly brings up information from the past which matches my current experience
in any way.
It was a lot. Pictures, sounds, smells, memories, my brain was just bombarding me with them at a very high speed. Once every few seconds I would get shocked at which kind of memories were brought up - some of them were about situations that happened very long time ago, when I was just a kid that could not even speak, and I never knew I remembered them. It felt like a cold computer doing a
big data
search query on my past life, trying to match each moment, second after second, constantly. And the matches were bizarre. I was actually impressed at them, I thought wow, I would never think of such connections myself. But they did make sense. I saw how great computational power it had, and I understood that..
..I stand no chance in trying to control, or even to know, what my subconsciousness brings up.
No chance. Won't oversmart it. Ever. It's great. Great fast computer, which is working non stop. Every second of my life. That was an amazing experience: to have a glimpse on how your subconsciousness works. And what is valuable for me from it, is not that I should continue smoking weed, but that I witnessed it. (I do not think that weed has any strict connection with this kind of experience, I guess it was just a coincidence of having the right mental state.) But now I have a hard proof. It really is there and it really works like how it is described by psychology. It only has much more data than I thought (and a lot of it is not even accessible to me), and this data comes up much faster than I thought. It was happening way faster than I can think (even without words).