Recently I see the increase in frequency of hearing genuine "thank you" from various people. Thank you for helping me out, for taking your time, for inviting me.. Now when I think about it, it's strange that I didn't hear it before. Or I didn't listen? Or I didn't seem valuable enough to thank for? Because I think I am more selfish now than before.
What I think it's that it's the anti-codependency effect - people start appreciating you when you appreciate yourself. Wow, so powerful. I also stopped diarrheaing on others with my own insecurities and doubts, so I don't put the self pity and self doubt topping on everything I say or do. I just do it / say it, and in my own head hope for the best. In the end, "I'm only huuuuman, after aaall, (...) don't put your blame on me" :D it's not that I became more confident, I started to better see the line between "my problem" and "their problem". And to understand that sometimes less is more. Kudos to the friend who pointed out a sentence of mine where first part was very smart and correct and second self pitying part destroyed all the message of the first part. True. Im trying to think twice before I surrender to an impulse to diarrheae after doing or saying something brave.