I have been watching a lot about ADD and Asperger's recently. Not about the symptoms, but videos from the people who have those conditions, about how they feel to them. And it made me a bit more "open minded" regarding the possible differences in brain functioning. I think what is important here, is that some behaviors that have been traditionally attributed to the "will" or its lack, can actually be caused by brain structure. That takes away the shame connected to that particular behavior, as it is no longer believed that a person experiencing it has actual control over it.
And that led to one realization today, which I think was previously blocked by such shame:
I automatically put all other people in position of authority.
And what happens in general when there is a person with authority? All people react differently to figures of authority, but many of those reactions are very unhealthy. Why? Because it resembles the parent-child relationship, which for most people was to some extent traumatic. So what happens if I put all the people in position of authority? I react in an unhealthy way to everyone.
So much can be explained with this.. somehow I am mixing up the "respect" with "authority". I bet many people do. Still, I think this is what creates the problems.